Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Creating awkward moments: the registry

So the awkward part of most wedding invitations is the registry listing. It's long been tacky to request specific gifts on most occasions and yet here is the most expected modern wedding tradition, developed for bridezillas to dictate exactly what gifts she would like, from the store she determines at the price everyone sees. Don't bother taking off that price tag, she already knew the price when she put it on her registry. Getting the cheapest one there? She'll know as soon as she opens that set of towels or single glass pitcher.

Thus, it's ironic that here I am, 9 months, 2 weeks and 4 days from my wedding, picking things out for my registry. It's a difficult thing for me though, because having lived on my own for the past few years already, I've acquired the basics like a toaster, silverware and stemmed glassware. Not to mention, as newlyweds, we are not planning on moving into a brand-new, 4-bedroom house in an upper class neighborhood, will not be entertaining the whole family at Thanksgiving this year and don't relish the thought of lugging 2 full sets of dusty china for years until we DO find that perfect house.

So my registry has developed a "help us decorate our place" theme. It includes things I could never justify as a budget-conscious bride, but really would love to have. I'm enjoying this window shopping that has the slightest potential for me to actually receive a few things on the list, and since I'm doing my OUR registry at Target, I don't feel like the snobby Bridezilla with 3 $500 Crate & Barrel laundry hampers on her list.

Another new fad is the honeymoon registry. This is one I may do if ideas for a honeymoon materialize down the road, closer to the wedding. This is one where the bride and groom can invite people to "buy a night at x motel for us" or "Reserve a table for 2 with champagne at y restaurant." It's actually an interesting idea, especially for couples who don't need house stuff. The problem though, is that it's best suited for people who know exactly where they're going, where they're staying, how much airplane tickets are, and have an idea of prices for everything right off the bat. Currently, our basic honeymoon ideas consist of maybe a road trip down to San Francisco and the Redwoods, or maybe Disneyland (darling Groom's request, but I'm really not feeling disneyland for a honeymoon, seems a little off, doesn't it?). Either way, being thrifty travelers that we are, I'm not sure how people would feel about a $30 "Buy a tank of gas to get us 250 miles closer to our destination(s) type of item. Ultimately, most of the things on a honeymoon registry are not set in stone (for instance, if someone buys you a $75 dinner, you're not obligated to use the $75 on just dinner), which is good for the happy couple, but I guess I have a hard time seeing guests really getting into it.

Overall, doing the registry is an interesting conundrum with my mind in such a thrifty funk. I have to remember that a $40 piece of art that seems expensive to me (because anything not absolutely necessary to our physical nourishment seems excessive these days) may be a bargain for guests who are used to spending upwards of $50-75 for other couples. So having a variety on my list is a challenge, and I truly hope no one thinks I'm going to expect to see every item on the list. That being said, what I've put on my registry IS the exact one I'd like to get, not just an example. That way I don't receive 4 varying griddles and no laundry basket. Returning a wedding gift is even more awkward than that registry note on an invitation.

No comments:

Post a Comment